Three Days in October

The Weekly Austin - 10.27.2010

2010-10-27T07:41:00.001-04:00

This One's A Keeper - 10.17.2010

Monday Sky

2010-07-19T07:58:00.000-04:00

The Weekly Austin - 7.14.10

2010-07-14T07:54:00.000-04:00

Ice Cream Sammich - 5.31.2010

Monday Sky

2010-07-12T07:56:00.000-04:00

The Weekly Austin - 7.7.10

2010-07-07T08:00:00.000-04:00

Soba Boy - 1.25.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 7.6.10

2010-07-06T07:47:00.000-04:00

Sharing is Caring - 3.10.2010

Monday Sky

2010-07-05T07:55:00.000-04:00

The Weekly Austin - 6.30.10

2010-06-30T08:41:00.000-04:00

Workin' at the Car Wash - 6.27.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 6.29.10

2010-06-29T08:39:00.000-04:00

Hiding from the Hose (Bama) - 6.27.2010

Monday Sky

2010-06-28T13:17:00.001-04:00

Changes

2010-06-21T07:53:00.002-04:00

This blog is slowly but surely becoming a wordless gallery of images. I'm fine with that, and I hope you are, too. Because starting this week, this blog is going to be strictly for photos. I'm finding that I just don't have enough words for two blogs, so 3DiO will be my photo blog, and I'll do my writing over at Foodie vs. Fattie. Cool? Cool.

The Weekly Austin - 6.15.10

2010-06-15T08:19:00.002-04:00

Full Tilt - May 31, 2010

The Weekly Austin - 5.19.10

2010-05-19T22:43:00.002-04:00

The Glamour of Toddlerhood - 4.6.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 5.18.10

2010-05-18T22:17:00.000-04:00

Relaxation - 5.7.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 4.13.10

2010-04-13T08:55:00.000-04:00

Twice Their Size

My friends' dog Diesel came and stayed with us for a few days. He's the sweetest monster dog EVER!

Friday Night Vans

2010-04-09T22:12:00.002-04:00

Shock Top, steak, and conversation, followed by Miami Vice and snuggles. Excellent Friday night.

The Weekly Austin - 4.7.10

2010-04-07T09:26:00.001-04:00

Hunting for Eggs - 4.4.10

Pugtastic Tuesday - 4.6.10

2010-04-06T20:07:00.003-04:00

Waiting for Daddy - 4.6.2010

Sprouting

2010-03-19T11:07:00.001-04:00

Gardening Season - 3.19.2010

The Weekly Austin - 3.17.10

2010-03-17T21:36:00.002-04:00

Chocolate Chips - 3.16.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 3.16.10

2010-03-16T17:20:00.002-04:00

Cookie Hound - 3.16.2010

Pugly, shown here, usually avoids Austin like the plague. The exception is when Austin is eating any kind of food. Today, it was cookies. Austin ran and ran and ran around the yard, chomping on a cookie, and Pugly was right behind him the whole way.

(Also, check out how Pugly is "stacking" like a show dog. WTF?!)

The Weekly Austin - A Day Late

2010-03-11T10:06:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was an absolute CLUSTER. Hence, the lack of blogging. My sincerest apologies, gentle reader! Here is your Weekly Austin, one day late.

Supervision - 3.10.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 3.9.10

2010-03-09T11:54:00.002-05:00

Pensive Pug - 2.26.10

The Weekly Austin - 3.3.2010

2010-03-03T08:55:00.000-05:00

Mr. Mischief - 2.26.2010

Those EYES. Those eyes are going to get that boy in so much trouble. An over-the-shoulder look is going to melt someone's heart. I know, because it melts mine.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 3.2.10

2010-03-02T08:52:00.000-05:00

Ladylike - 2.26.2010

Bama (my littler pug) has a funny way of sitting. She sticks her back legs forward, and then puts her front legs on either side. It's one of my favorite things about her.

Also, can I just say how much I love that today's date is 3-2-10?! I keep repeating it to myself, "Three! Two! One! ZERO!" Yes, I am nerdy. And also slightly insane.

Les Vans

2010-02-26T10:38:00.003-05:00

These here? These're my VANS. I love them so much. I missed them so much when I was heavier; when they finally fit again, I rejoiced. I wore Vans like these for the majority of my childhood -- growing up at the beach, 80's surfer chic was what we all wore. Corduroy shorts by Op (that's Ocean Pacific), slip-on Vans, and a t-shirt from either my dad's car dealership or Pete Smith's surf shop.

I have a weird urge to take pictures of these shoes on a regular basis. So, since this blog is turning into a mostly-photo blog anyway, and because I'm inspired by my friends Tucker and Brittany and their Pear 365 project, I'm going to take a picture of Ye Olde Vans every Friday for the next year. I can't promise exotic locales, supermodels, or fancy lighting, but I can promise you'll see these red and black monsters every Friday from now on. Footwear Friday! Woo!

The Weekly Austin - 2.24.2010

2010-02-24T17:25:00.002-05:00

Doin' The T. Rex Boogie - 12.25.2009

Pugtastic Tuesday - 2.23.10

2010-02-23T10:39:00.002-05:00

A Pug and Her Boy - 2.15.2010

Austin's new chore is walking the dogs. He loves it; they need it (desperately). It's a win-win.

Weird Dreams

2010-02-18T09:28:00.004-05:00

I woke up the other night and had to write down a dream. It was the strangest, oddest, most vivid dream I've had in a long time. I wish I could blame this on the Percocet I'm taking, but I have odd dreams on a pretty regular basis. And I almost always remember them in the morning.

Anyway, in this particular episode of weirdness, there were strange, contorted people -- mutants -- who were for some reason warehoused in these clean, sunny rooms. The people were literally folded up and stacked against each other, their bodies the shape of Rit-Dye bottles. They were in some sort of wrapper, almost like a silicone sleeve. They were blind (I think) and couldn't speak. In the dream, these weird Rit people were being threatened by something outside, I want to say vampires but that doesn't sound right. Something outside wanted to come in and get them.

Here's what I drew and wrote in my sketchbook as soon as I woke up:

My notes say:

"They can't run. Their legs have been folded up so long. And they have horrible faces and can't speak -- just wails of fear and groans. Contorted people. Mutants. Legs folded in some kind of impossible lotus. They lean against each other in stacks/piles in secure rooms full of sunshine. I don't know how they're alive. There is something menacing outside. Windows are locked and but they let in sunshine. The windows are covered in cotton batting."

I tell Charlie about my dreams, and he always gives me the "You are CRAAAAAAZY" face. He hardly ever remembers his dreams, and finds it funny that there's so much detail in mine. I think dreams are so interesting -- not so much because I think you can find meaning or hidden messages, but because they're basically the trash dump of your subconscious. Whatever random junk your brain decides to put together, that becomes the story for the night.

The Weekly Austin - 2.17.2010

2010-02-17T08:35:00.000-05:00

She Is My Pillow - 2.15.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 2.16.10

2010-02-16T11:01:00.004-05:00

Threshold - 2.15.2010

Until I purchased my newest Mac, I generally avoided iPhoto because of how it manages image files. I'm still not a fan of that aspect of the program, but I'm really enjoying the basic editing tools it includes.

For the most part I don't do a whole lot of image editing or enhancement; I try to get the image I want in the camera. I learned photography the old-fashioned way, with a 35mm film camera and a darkroom. You could fix a lot of things in the darkroom, but it was always better to have a good negative to begin with. So, when I shoot digital, I try to get the image exactly right, or as close to right as possible, before it ever makes it to my computer. I use editing tools to make the final image match my memory of the shot -- the "feeling" of the picture.

What does that have to do with Pugtastic Tuesday? Well, nothing really. I get asked pretty frequently about how and what I shoot, and why, so I thought I'd share. I tweaked the pug portrait above using the simple iPhoto editing tools, and I'm happy with the result. In the coming weeks (months?) I'll be posting more images and writing not just about the content but my photographic process. Photography is my long lost love, and I'm going back to her as a hobby to keep myself happy.

The Weekly Austin - 2.3.2010

2010-02-03T10:06:00.003-05:00

Snow Monkey - 1.30.2010

We rarely get snow in this part of Virginia, so Austin's never been able to play in it. This past weekend's horrible weather gave him his first chance for an adventure in actual snow, and he loved it. As Charlie shoveled the driveway, Austin helped by taking two handfuls of snow at a time to the pile Charlie made. He also threw snow at the dogs, at me, and just right up into the air. So much fun!

Pugtastic Tuesday - 2.2.10

2010-02-02T08:09:00.000-05:00

Wreenkles - 1.25.2010

The Weekly Austin - 1.27.10

2010-01-27T08:58:00.000-05:00

Four Wheelin' - 1.12.10

Pugtastic Tuesday - 1.26.10

2010-01-26T08:52:00.000-05:00

Huh? - 1.12.2010

Change of Plans

2010-01-21T12:05:00.002-05:00

I sat down at my desk today with a plan to write about this past weekend. One of my dear friends had her baby, and it was a really amazing experience. I had all sorts of feelings and revelations (REVELATIONS! Like the MORMONS!) that I wanted to share.

Instead, I'm sitting here at my desk wondering why, after 32 years, I still can't seem to do anything right. So far today, I have:

1. Overslept by almost two hours, causing my boss to have to come in early, my store to open late, and many, many people getting to work late (sorry, April!).

2. Spilled coffee all over my Jeep.

3. Unknowingly allowed a friend to become more upset over something I thought was resolved.

4. Forgot to deposit the cash in my wallet, the cash that had to be deposited to cover what I spent on Tuesday.

So yeah, it's been a FANTASTIC day so far. *sigh* I'm trying to stay on track, stay upbeat, and get stuff done. That was working pretty well until about an hour ago. Now? Now I need some hugs.

The Weekly Austin - 1.20.10

2010-01-20T11:27:00.000-05:00

Nappin' With Daddy - 1.13.2010

Pugtastic Tuesday - 1.19.10

2010-01-19T11:24:00.001-05:00

Black and White Means It's ART - 12.1.2009

Birfday Wrapup

2010-01-14T09:20:00.003-05:00

Yesterday was my 32nd birthday. Wow.

It started out like any other day -- a four-hour opening shift with Felicia, then back to the house. Charlie took the day off so we could spend some time together, and so I could go to my surgical consult. Charlie and Austin drove me to my appointment, and we stopped at Michael's beforehand. I picked out some awesome bits and bobs to make a present for my friend Lauren (since the painting I was working on for her baby's room turned into a sucktastic mess).

And what did Doc have to say? My gall bladder has to come out. Wah wahhhh. My surgery is scheduled for Valentine's weekend. Because, you know, nothing says LOVE like a weekend at the hospital. He's also going to take a peek at my "mystery bulge" and fix whatever it is, if necessary.

Oh! I also met with a plastic surgeon on Tuesday, and he's going to take out my face bump (actually a sebaceous cyst) on Monday. Woo hoo!

Anyhow, after my appointment, we met up with one of my favorite peeps, the famous LINH! We ate lunch at Pho 79 and then hit up Four Seasons Oriental Grocery. If you've never been to an Oriental grocery, I highly recommend it. Not only do they have good produce (like delicious bok choi) but there's random meat products (CHICKEN FEET!), canned goods (PICKLED MANGO!), and Japanese candy (TINY CHOCOLATE MUSHROOM COOKIES THAT LOOK LIKE...well, you know!). And they have all the gear you need for Chinese New Year, which falls on Valentine's Day this year according to Linh.

Linh also convinced me to try aloe vera juice. The taste was okay, but the chunks...I was not prepared for a "chewable" beverage. Don't think I'll be drinking that again any time soon.

As if that weren't enough, I also got a can of my favorite thing ever: HELLO BOSS ICED COFFEE!

Now, I don't know why in the hell this stuff is called "Hello Boss," but it is HELLO DELICIOUS. It tastes like the iced coffee you get at a Thai or Vietnamese restaurant.

When we got back to the house, I was in dire need of a nap. So, I headed upstairs and promptly zonked out. A couple of hours later, I came downstairs and found Charlie and Austin on the couch, both fast asleep. (Apparently pho makes you sleepy, because Linh told me later that she took a post-lunch nap too!)

Charlie's mom came over to watch Austin for the evening, and Charlie took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner -- No Frill Grill! We had a great meal, and managed to make it home in time to get Austin to bed ourselves.

All in all, this was the BEST birthday I've ever had. I'm so glad that I got to spend time with all the people I love. I'm really loving my life right now!

The Weekly Austin - 1.13.10

2010-01-13T08:18:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday, Mommy!

Pugtastic Tuesday - 1.12.10

2010-01-12T08:53:00.002-05:00

"I Love You, Pugly!"

"Thhhhhpt."

Gratitude

2010-01-11T21:40:00.003-05:00

I spent most of today getting back to normal after what was a crazy and fun-filled weekend full of pre-birthday treats. On Saturday, I went to the super-fabulous Best Body Company for a massage, haircut, and make-up application after getting my nails done by one of my favorite ladies in the world (Ms. Carrie of Chambord Nails, aka THE NAIL DOCTAH!). Aside from the general fantasticness of spa pampering, it was also a great day because my massage therapist turned out to be somebody who a) went to my high school, b) loves all the same music I do, and c) is also converting to Judaism. We both really enjoyed talking through my whole massage; it was like hanging out with someone I'd known for years. Oh, and did I mention that she worked at the shop where I bought my very first pair of Doc Marten's boots? IT IS PUNK ROCK KISMET, I TELL YOU!

On my way home from the salon, I texted Charlie (who I thought was at work) to let him know I was all done. I had planned to go home, have a glass o' wine, and fall dead asleep. He replied with a request -- go buy laundry detergent, and buy it NOW. I was really not happy about this, so I called him. He explained that the big jug of Gain I'd just bought slipped off the top of the washer, crashed onto the floor, and spilled soap all over the place. I was beyond pissed. Not only because I had seriously JUST BOUGHT that detergent, but because he was asking me to turn around and head back out to the shops (I was almost home). I got a little pissy on the phone, explaining that no, I was NOT going to buy detergent tonight, and demanding to know why he, comfortably ensconced in his office, felt such an urgent need for me to make this purchase.

Well, as I rounded the corner onto our street, I saw Charlie's truck in the driveway, and I immediately knew exactly why he wanted to keep me out of the house. He had planned a surprise birthday party for me, and I wasn't supposed to be there yet. No guests had arrived aside from my pal Cody. I felt so, so bad. Charlie was, to say the least, upset. "The one time, ONE TIME I need you to be an obedient wife, and you don't do it!" he laughed.

It all worked out just fine in the end. All my friends showed up, and I even got to see The Hong (haven't seen her in way too long!) and my dear Jason Hanasik (in from SanFran and looking amazing!) and Pegg0rs (she wore hooker boots for me!). There were presents, cocktails, an amazing birthday cake from JoAnna, food, silliness, and a dinosaur with a party hat. It was such a blast!

The only part that sucked was that I had to open on Sunday morning. That means I had to be at work at 5:45AM. WOO! What a fun shift that was...blargh. Poor Sarah and Tara! They had to put up with my tired, cranky butt all day.

I got home from work and crashed. Charlie was out helping my mom with her home entertainment gear. He brought Austin home in the afternoon, and we spent the rest of the day just relaxing and enjoying each other.

I fell asleep last night thinking about how lucky I am, and how grateful I am, to have such amazing friends and family. I love, love, LOVE all of you!

The Weekly Austin - 1.6.10

2010-01-06T08:00:00.001-05:00

"Dude. I'm totally tweeting what you just said."

Pugtastic Tuesday - 1.5.10

2010-01-05T12:07:00.003-05:00

Bama Kisses! - 5.30.2007

I love this picture for a number of reasons: my hair is long, I look very happy, my grass is green. And I just realized this is also right about when I got pregnant with Austin. Wow!

Thoughts on 2009

2010-01-01T22:26:00.003-05:00

I'm trying my hand at the New Year's quiz done by two of my favorite bloggers, Linda and Mona. I know I'm getting it in just under the wire here, but hey, I've been in a Percocet haze for the last 48 hours or so.

What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?

I finished a 5K "fun run" with my dear friend, Peggy. I never thought I'd be able to run comfortably in public again, let alone for 3.2 miles. But I did it -- I finished.

I also shot a handgun (under supervision, at a shooting range). It was more enjoyable than I thought it would be, and I was pretty good at it. I couldn't get past the fact that the thing in my hand was specifically designed to end a life, though. *shudder*

Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I think the only resolution I made last year was to take better care of my teeth. I did that, for the most part -- still working on the flossing.

This year, I'm setting specific, measurable goals with deadlines. One of them? To take the damn NCE and be done with my massage certification once and for all. Another is to resolve all of my seemingly never-ending medical issues (hernia, knee, facial cyst, and now gall bladder). I'll probably write more about these in a separate post.

Did anyone close to you give birth?

Not this year, but there's a very special baby scheduled to appear in the next couple of weeks!

Did anyone close to you die?

Not this year, thank goodness.

What countries did you visit?

I'm a regular in Lala Land.

What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

I'd like to have a little more patience, and make more time for friends. Also, five or ten extra mortgage payments would be nice.

What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

It's been a fairly uneventful year, to be honest. If I had to pick, I'd say Austin's first birthday, my 5K, and DC Pride.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I think, other than my 5K, I'm most proud of my vegetable garden. 2009 was the first year I had a full-blown vegetable patch, and actually managed to keep the plants alive AND generate edible produce.

What was your biggest failure?

I didn't take my NCE. I wanted to get it done in 2009, and I didn't.

Did you suffer illness or injury?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA! Oh man...this has definitely been the year of body-fail for me. Incisional hernia, stomach viruses, suspected repeat hernia which turned out to be nothing despite excruciating pain, blown knee, and now (dun dun DAHHH) a faulty gall bladder.

What was the best thing you bought?

A brand-spankin' new kitchen. BEST. INVESTMENT. EVER.

Whose behavior merited celebration?

I vote for my friend Peggy. Like every year that I've known her, in 2009, she was selfless, generous, caring, and essentially the kind of person I aspire to be.

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I have a couple of family members who hurt me very badly this year, and whose behavior not only puzzles me but deeply, deeply disturbs me. 'Nuff said.

Where did most of your money go?

Debt, debt, and more debt. *sigh*

What did you get really excited about?

Traveling to DC with my friends, the TikiHulaLuau Fest (aka Felicia's birthday party), concerts at the amphitheater, Lauren's pregnancy, the success of my friends Jason H (amazing fine art photographer) and Jason J (amazing wedding photographer), the Hubs's decision to pursue a nursing degree after completing his MBA.

Compared to this time last year, are you...

...happier or sadder? Happier, fo' shizzle.

...thinner or fatter? Thinner, I'm pretty sure.

...richer or poorer? Poor in money, but rich in love & friendship.

What do you wish you'd done more of?

I wish I'd done more writing. Less talking, more listening.

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Eating. Spending. CONSUMING.

How did you spend Christmas?

I was surrounded by friends and family, cooked a ton of food, ate bunches, and enjoyed every minute of it.

Did you fall in love in 2009?

I'm very much in love with my little guy (not so little anymore!). And like every year, I found new reasons to love my Charlie (even when he was driving me batshit crazy).

What was your favorite television program?

LOST, with Heroes coming in a close second.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

I don't hate anyone, period. Life's too short to waste emotional energy on hate.

What was the best book you read?

I dug out my Madeline L'Engle books -- A Wrinkle In Time, A Wind In The Door, and A Swiftly Tilting Planet -- and re-read them. They're just as amazing as they were when I was 12.

What was your greatest musical discovery?

I rediscovered the Beach Boys, "Pet Sounds" in particular. So good, so very, very good. Thank you, Brian Wilson.

What did you want and get?

A Blackberry! And now I never put it down...bwahahahaha.

What did you want and not get?

I really wanted Austin to start talking, and he hasn't yet.

What was your favorite film of this year?

I know it didn't come out this year, but I watched "The Departed" about six thousand times. It's just the best.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Had dinner at California Pizza Kitchen with my mom, went out for Indian food with the hubs, and had a smallish party at my house. I was 31.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

An honest-to-goodness vacation, to someplace tropical.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

"I hope these still fit." See also: Old Navy clearance rack.

What kept you sane?

Writing. Running. Friends. My mom. My kiddo.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Ohhhhh...Matty MacFadyen, fo' reals. Hot MI-5 agent, Mr. Darcy, WHATEVER. Just give me some of that British hotness.

What political issue stirred you the most?

Gay marriage. To steal Mona's line, "Let them marry, bish!"

Who did you miss?

I miss my father-in-law. Chuck, if you're watching, I used extra butter just for you.

Who was the best new person you met?

Well, technically I met them in 2008, but Lauren and Jack are my two favorite peeps of '09.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

You can make your own family. And family is what you make of it.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

"I feel so broke up, I wanna go home." (Beach Boys, "Sloop John B")

A Bilious New Year's Eve

2009-12-31T13:28:00.003-05:00

If you follow me on Twitter, you may have seen a couple of my posts about having a stomach ache. I felt sick after eating lunch on Tuesday, made a slight recovery, and then had some gut-busting stomach pain at bedtime. I woke up on Wednesday feeling just fine, and assumed the previous day's complaints were caused by questionable leftovers.

I ate breakfast (pancakes by Charlie, yay!) and lunch (whole wheat pasta) without any issues. Dinner was a turkey sub from Jimmy John's. I had to head for bed early because I was scheduled to open the next day. Almost as soon as I lay down, the same god-awful abdominal pain came back with a vengeance. Unlike the previous night, where the pain came in waves and I was eventually able to fall asleep, the pain was unrelenting. Eventually, I horked up my dinner.

Charlie was there next to me, rubbing my back and saying how sorry he was that there was nothing he could do. I felt beyond awful. Finally, we decided that I should probably go to the ER and get checked out since vomiting, severe abdominal pain, and fever can be signs of really serious problems. Charlie took care of all the phone calls -- my mom, my boss, etc. I bundled myself up in the Jeep and then we were on our way.

I tell you what, I must have had the magical combo of symptoms that ensures speedy admittance, because within about ten minutes of arriving, I was in a hospital gown (hello! there's my butt hanging out the back!) and laid out on a bed. The nurse started an IV, then a doctor came in and asked me the usual questions. She suspected right away that my gall bladder was the culprit, and ordered an ultrasound.

Fast forward a few hours and I was full of painkillers and anti-nausea drugs, and my ultrasound was done. The nurse came back and told us that I had gallstones, but that I wasn't in need of immediate surgery (whew!). She referred me to my regular doctor, and sent me packing with a nice kit of drugs.

So that's where we are today. I'm feeling better, although there were some twinges after lunch (nothing fatty, just more wheat pasta). My doc's office is closed until Monday, so I've got to wait until then to make an appointment. In the meantime, I'll be back at work on Sunday, and eating bland, non-fatty, non-spicy food for the next few days (bleh!).

All I can think of is that a) I'm glad we didn't have any fancy or expensive plans for New Year's Eve and b) I'm REALLY glad they didn't whisk me off to surgery last night. I mean, waiting for my regular doctor, waiting for more test results, waiting for a surgical referral, that's all going to suck, but I'd rather be home with my family (and my drugs, bwahahaha) instead of putting my life on hold for God knows how long.

Here's hoping that 2010 is a better year for me, health wise. I sure would like to try and go a year without any major medical procedures.

The Weekly Austin - Christmas Wrapup

2009-12-30T08:45:00.000-05:00

ZOMG! - 12.25.09

We had an absolutely fantastic Christmas. Austin's just old enough to "get it," and his excitement was contagious. His expression in this picture really conveys how we all felt throughout the day: WOW, how lucky are WE?!

My parents, along with Charlie's mom and grandma, joined us for the day. Our dear friends Jack and Lauren also came, and their gifts to Austin have been two of his favorites. One is a giant rubber dinosaur that Austin is now treating like his baby -- feeding it, giving it sips of juice, and even wiping its face in the morning. The other is a sort of wooden tower with balls that have to be hammered through holes in the top.

Charlie's mom gets the award for Gifts Most Likely to Give Mommy A Migraine -- four plastic cars that, when shaken, make extremely loud engine-revving sounds. Austin loves them, though, so I have to put up with it. Next year I'll have to ask for earplugs and a case of Excedrin.

My parents gave Austin mostly noise-free toys (THANK YOU, MOM!), including some bad-ass construction equipment (dump truck, front loader, bulldozer), a basketball hoop, and a Leapfrog Tag Junior reading system.

I haven't even come close to listing everything that was given to Austin -- that would take days. I'm blown away by everyone's generosity. And Austin really loved everything. (He even went apeshit over some Thomas the Tank Engine pajamas.)

More important than the presents, though, was the presence of our family and friends. I looked around the room and saw people who love me, love my son, love my family. And I love them all back!

Pugtastic Tuesday - 12.29.09

2009-12-29T09:02:00.002-05:00

Guardian of the Presents - 12.25.09

Bama enjoyed plunking herself down in front of Austin while he opened presents on Christmas day. I think she did it to make sure she'd be in as many pictures as possible. What a ham.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-25T08:00:00.000-05:00

The Magic of Christmas (Eve)

2009-12-24T20:06:00.003-05:00

What a day we've had! I baked, I cleaned, I had Thai food. I got to spend time with two of my most favorite people. I got to see my little guy get ridiculously excited about Santa, the tree, and the whole works. Just plain awesome all around.

Tomorrow will be a busy day, and I'll be thinking of you all. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas. And if it gets stressful, or sad, or just not fun, try to remember how magical it all seemed when we were kids. Remember how lucky we all are, how blessed we are to have each other, our families, our friends, our homes, our jobs...all of it. Remember what it's really about -- not just the birth of Christ, but also hope, and family, and love.

Santa's Little Helper - 12.24.2009

The Weekly Austin - 12.23.09

2009-12-23T07:20:00.000-05:00

Forgetting that I'd left a box of Kleenex on a low shelf, I turned my back on Austin for about five minutes. When I walked back into the dining room, this is what I found:

The Great Kleenex Incident - 12.21.09

As soon as he spotted me, he started jamming all the tissues back in the box.

As Good As New!

I don't punish Austin for doing things like this. He's a toddler, and this is what toddlers do. (And really, it's my fault for leaving the Kleenex within his reach.) But just like any other time he makes a mess, he knows he has to help clean it up.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 12.22.09

2009-12-22T11:44:00.003-05:00

What A Pair - 12.12.09

It used to be much easier to tell these two apart. Lately, though, Pugly (on the left in this shot) has gotten thinner and 'Bama has gotten fatter, so from behind, they're almost identical.

Turkey Soup!

2009-12-17T11:42:00.000-05:00

It's getting to be the time of year where we get a lot of "Soup Weather" here in Virginia. You know, the kind of weather that makes you want to put on an LL Bean sweater, listen to soft jazz, and eat some fantastic soup?

So this week, I dragged out a turtleneck and some Kenny G CDs (hahahahaha...no, really), and made some soup with a leftover turkey breast that I roasted on Saturday. And kids, this is a soup you must try for yourself!

I cut up some carrots, celery, onion, and garlic, into big chunks, and sauteed 'em in a large stock pot with a little olive oil. Then I tossed in the turkey breast carcass, and filled the pot up with enough water to cover the turkey. Brought it to a boil, and then let that sucker simmer until it reduced by at least half. At this point, I added some herbs - parsley, sage - and pepper, but only a TEENY bit of salt. If you add too much salt now, the broth will be extremely salty at the end (because you're going to boil off most of the water, which will concentrate the salt).

After that, I strained it, and put it back into a clean pot. (You can reduce it again if you want a super-concentrated turkey stock.) I was expecting to have to skim the fat off as well, but there wasn't much; I didn't leave a lot of skin or meat on the carcass.

The next steps turned that broth in to fo' reals soupy goodness. I added:

Chick peas (garbanzo beans)

Corn

Celery

Carrots

Diced tomatoes (canned, drained well)

It just occurred to me that rice would be a great addition, or some fresh spinach (it'll wilt as soon as it hits the hot broth). Might try that next time.

I also dumped in a container of chicken stock (LOW SODIUM!), just because there wasn't quite enough liquid for all those veggies.

Then, I added the leftover turkey meat - I had about 1/2 a pound. I grabbed a spoon and took a slurp. It tasted SO good, but needed a little seasoning, so I added some more parsley and sage, along with a little more salt.

Here's the end result:

Man-o-MAN, was this tasty! And it's pretty healthy, thanks to all the veggies. It really hit the spot on a cold, drizzly December day. Give it a try next time you have a leftover bird.

The Weekly Austin - 12.16.09

2009-12-17T11:35:00.004-05:00

This was supposed to post automatically yesterday. Not sure why it didn't! Anyhoo...enjoy!

Smile for Daddy! - 12.10.09

Pugtastic Tuesday - 12.15.09

2009-12-15T11:38:00.002-05:00

Mmmm, Carrots! 12.09.09

Last Wednesday was unseasonably warm, so Austin and I headed outside to do some work on my now-dormant vegetable garden. We pulled up the last of the carrots, and Austin decided to share some with Pugly.

The Weekly Austin - 12.09.09

2009-12-09T08:37:00.000-05:00

Just Hanging Out - 12.01.09

Pugtastic Tuesday - 12.08.09

2009-12-08T17:59:00.002-05:00

Wrapping Presents is Tiring! - 11.23.09

The Weekly Austin - Holiday '09 Edition

2009-12-02T14:05:00.004-05:00

Last year, I had grand plans to take a fantastic Xmas picture of Austin and make it into a card to send to everyone we know. (SEE? SEE HOW CUTE OUR KID IS? SUCK IT!) My mom got him a great little outfit, the tree was perfect, and I had borrowed kick-ass gear with which to shoot this masterpiece.

What'd I end up with?

That's right. That's a SCREAMING BABY. And we all know, nothing says "Hooray for the Birth of Jesus" like a screaming baby.

With these memories fresh in my mind, I decided to take another crack at it this year. He's so much older! I thought. He can follow instructions! And he co-operates with me most of the time! I just knew I'd get much better results. (I can hear my mom laughing her ass off all the way from Virginia Beach as she reads this.)

I'm not sure if it's the button-down shirts, the Xmas tree, or what, but Austin and holiday snaps? DO. NOT. AGREE. Behold, Screaming Baby's replacement, SCREAMING TODDLER:

And in case you're wondering, I had to do a tight close-up because the only way to keep this writhing demon spawnI MEAN MY BELOVED CHILD still was to wedge him into his Bumbo seat. This was pretty much the best shot I got.

So if you get a holiday card from me this year, don't be surprised if it's a stick figure scrawled onto a Post-It note. Because Mommy is packing up her camera gear and climbing into the bathtub with a bottle of wine. (Isn't that what all the pros do?)

Down on the Farm

2009-11-22T11:47:00.012-05:00

Austin and I took a ride out to Suffolk yesterday to pick up our Thanksgiving turkey. My mom and stepdad were there as well, and I got a few really cute pictures of Austin enjoying the sights and sounds of the farm.

His favorite? The cat.

But there were also cows, including a two-week-old calf...

And chickens...

And football...

And lots of running around with Grandpa...

And much toddler handsomeness...

It was a great day. We'll definitely be back next year!

All pictures were taken at Full Quiver Farm in Suffolk, Virginia. And no, I didn't get a free turkey for blogging about them.

The Weekly Austin - 11.18.09

2009-11-18T09:20:00.001-05:00

Truck Tower - 11.12.09

Pugtastic Tuesday - 11.17.09

2009-11-17T15:02:00.003-05:00

Licking Her Own Eyebrow - 11.12.2009

At Ease

2009-11-16T19:49:00.005-05:00

I remember reading Jane Kenyon's poems at one of the worst points in my depression. Her collection "Constance" sat on my bedside table and I read it over and over and over again. She described the pain and anguish I was feeling better than anyone (save Sylvia Plath) I'd ever read. The words in this piece, from "Having It Out With Melancholy," pressed against my pain like a tourniquet, making it surge before it dwindled:

5. ONCE THERE WAS LIGHT

Once, in my early thirties, I saw

that I was a speck of light in the great

river of light that undulates through time.

I was floating with the whole

human family. We were all colors -- those

who are living now, those who have died,

those who are not yet born. For a few

moments I floated, completely calm,

and I no longer hated having to exist.

Like a crow who smells hot blood

you came flying to pull me out

of the glowing stream.

"I'll hold you up. I never let my dear

ones drown!" After that, I wept for days.

I read these poems now, the poems that pinpointed my agony, made me feel less alone, brought on wave after wave of uncontrollable tears, and they're like memories of a battle. They're the stories you tell about a scar.

I still feel as though I'm floating now. The days are flowing by, but for once, I don't feel disconnected, adrift, aimless. There's no one, no malevolent thing, to snatch me out of the light. The fear has faded, the panic is gone.

The Weekly Austin - 11.11.09

2009-11-11T07:48:00.003-05:00

Where's Your Bee-Bo? 11.4.09

Austin really likes the Sandra Boynton books. His favorite is "The Belly Button Book," in which a tiny hippopotamus refers to hers as a "bee-bo." While he doesn't actually say "bee-bo" yet, Austin does know where to look for his (and anyone else's). In these pictures, he's having a little trouble finding it.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 11.10.09

2009-11-10T15:21:00.003-05:00

Pugly: "If I stare at him long enough, he'll give me that tomato."

Bama: "ismellsomethinginhispocketWEEEEEEE!"

OH FOR THE LOVE OF PETE!

2009-11-06T16:36:00.003-05:00

Most of the time, I feel like I have the most perfect kid in the universe: affectionate, funny, not a picky eater, sleeps like a brick, loves everybody. And then there's this afternoon.

This afternoon, I am the proud mother of a screaming, head-butting, slapping, fit-throwing T. Rex who apparently does not want me to make dinner. How do I know? Because every time I walk in the kitchen, he wedges himself in between me and whatever work surface I'm trying to use, and caterwauls until I pick him up. I have tried ignoring him -- I get hit with whatever toy is handy. If I pick him up, he immediately wiggles and squirms to be put down, then cries when I DO put him down (lather, rinse, repeat). I've tried a snack, I've tried a drink (for him, not me, although MAN does that sound good right about now), I've tried reading together, watching a show together, ad infinitum ad nauseum.

And now we've reached the point that I like to call "OH FOR THE LOVE OF PETE WOULD YOU PLEASE STOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!" I don't yell this out loud, or even say it in a regular voice. But it blares in my brain at full volume -- almost like in The Shining, when Danny sends a telepathic message to Dick Hallorann that's so strong, Dick feels like he's going to pass out (or something like that):

"ZOMG I CAN'T LISTEN TO ANY MORE OF THIS FUCKING WHINING!"

This is the point where I have to carry the screaming, kicking T. Rex up the stairs, put him in his crib, shut the door, and walk away. Because seriously? Mommy needs a time out.

I'd never, never, NEVER do anything to hurt my son. Even at the worst of these moments, when I feel my blood boiling, and all I want to do is scream right back at him, it never enters my mind to hit him out of anger. But I also know that sometimes very scary things happen in the brains of tired, stressed, hungry mommies on the verge of their own little meltdown.

So I walk away, and I turn the volume down on the baby monitor (it's up just enough for me to hear if he's doing anything other than peevish whining), and I wait for the transformation -- his, not mine. I get my shit together, and then I go upstairs and get him. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Thanksgiving Fever

2009-11-05T11:40:00.002-05:00

Maybe it's the weather, maybe it's the leaves on the ground, or maybe it's the fact that the Williams-Sonoma Thanksgiving catalog arrived a few days ago, but MAN! I am ON FIRE for the holidays this year!

Not to make anybody sick with my crazy organization/planning, but I've already decided on the Turkey Day menu. The majority of the recipes are from Williams-Sonoma, including the same stuffing I made the last time I did a holiday dinner. What I'm saying is, this food is going to be THE JAM.

We're having about eight people over, so with us, that's ten. Well, ten and a half if you count Austin, who will probably chew on a roll and a piece of celery for thirty seconds and then proclaim, "All done!" Aside from parties, I haven't cooked for quite this many people before. But you know what makes it extra super fantastical? My new kitchen! I will have counter space! And a work island! AND IT IS CLEAN! There are not enough caps or exclamation points to express my excitement, so forgive me for typing like a thirteen year old girl. I'm filled with the urge to type ZOMG TKSGIVING! over and over again.

Anyhoo, what's YOUR big plans for the holidays?

The Weekly Austin - 11.04.09

2009-11-04T08:47:00.000-05:00

Plainclothes Jedi - 11.03.09

Austin was Yoda for Halloween. His costume has been washed and put away, but the lightsaber remains. He loves it. L-O-V-E LOVES it. He's unbearably cute running around the house with this thing. Totally a safety hazard, but really...is there a cooler way to get injured than with your very own LIGHTSABER?!

Pugtastic Tuesday - 11.03.09

2009-11-03T14:45:00.002-05:00

Sad Face - 10.21.09

Oh, Mr. Pugly. Still not feeling well. Still limping around. We're doing our best to keep him comfortable, but he just looks so darn pitiful. Poor old man.

Die! Die Crickets! DIE!

2009-11-02T12:05:00.002-05:00

I've spent the last half hour or so trying to find a video clip of Dave Matthews telling a really funny story about crickets. No luck -- it's from an episode of MTV Unplugged from about a million years ago. Anyhoo, the gist of the story is that one of his friends from South Africa wigged out and set a bunch of crickets on fire in a bathtub.

I totally and completely identify with the desire to light those fockers up.

Now, I'm not talking about good ol' Jiminy, or even the shiny black crickets you find in the backyard. I'm talking about these things:

Camel cricket, cave cricket, spider cricket, NASTY SCARY MOTHERFUCKING ALIEN CRICKET MENACE, whatever you want to call them, I hate them. With a passion.

I don't hate them because they do damage (they don't) or because they bite (they don't) or even because I generally dislike insects (I don't). I hate them because they hop, they hop FAR, and they hop in a very erratic fashion. Like, HOLY HELL IT'S COMING RIGHT FOR MY FACE. They're also huge, at least around here.

Why do I bring this up, you might ask? Well, guess what I found in my bathtub at 4 AM today? That's right. NASTY SCARY MOTHERFUCKING ALIEN CRICKET MENACE. Definitely not what I wanted to see as I was about to hop in the shower. I had to run to the utility room and grab a bottle of Clorox Cleanup -- the chemical of choice for cricket elimination. (Not really, but we didn't have any bug spray.) After hosing him down with the stuff for what felt like an eternity, he finally died. I put on a glove, wrapped him in TP, and flushed his alien cricket menace ass down the toilet.

I'll still be checking that toilet every time I use it for at least three days. For all I know, he's some sort of alien cricket ninja whose compadres will climb out of the sewer to avenge his death.

Halloween Weekend Recap

2009-11-01T15:14:00.007-05:00

This weekend has been absolutely nuts. I haven't been to this many social events since, well, forever. First, there was the Halloween party at Peggy and Brandon's house. My costume?

ZOMBIE JOGGER!

It was a great night, despite the fact that I ate too much and drank a little too much. Everyone's costumes were awesome -- we had a Vikings superfan, a potted flower and her box of Miracle Gro, and of course Dorothy and the Scarecrow, our hosts.

Saturday, we went to Little T's pirate-themed birthday party. Austin did pretty well, despite the fact that we didn't let him help T open his presents. There was cake, which he totally chowed down on...

...and Charlie actually managed to get a good picture of the two of us!

After the party, we ran a couple of errands, and then it was time to get ready for trick or treating. Austin wasn't really happy about his costume at first.

By the time we got to my mom's house (we trick or treat in her neighborhood because it's safer, and well, they give out better candy!) Austin was in a much better mood. He kept his costume on the whole time and didn't get freaked out by anyone except a random ten year old in a Michael Myers mask (ugh!).

Mom took us out for Mexican food, and then we headed home. I'd planned on having some folks from work over to watch scary movies, but by the time we hit the door, I was so freakin' tired. I could barely keep my eyes open. I put the word out that movie night was cancelled. Nobody seemed disappointed -- I think most everyone had other plans anyway -- so I didn't feel too bad about it.

To finish up the night, we kicked back on the couch and watched "Jeepers Creepers" (which I think would have been a much scarier movie if the bad guy was just a psycho and not some sort of alien monster bug thing).

Today's been kind of boring. I'm not feeling so hot (might be getting a cold, I think), Charlie's painting the trim in the kitchen, and I'm trying desperately to avoid the Halloween candy.

How was YOUR weekend?

Le Sigh

2009-10-30T12:22:00.003-04:00

Well, it's Friday. I opened this morning (fourth time this week) and I got my run in (also the fourth time this week) but DAMN am I tired now. I took a power nap, about thirty minutes or so, but the chill in the air is making me want to go fetal on the couch and watch TV all day.

However, today I need to:

1. Check out Costco (I hear they have a better selection of organics than BJs).

2. Get the last couple of pieces I need for my Halloween costume.

3. Clean up my office.

4. Prep dinner for the boys.

5. Check out running shoes (this is a maybe, depending on our finances).

Well poop. That seemed like a whole lot more stuff before I typed it out. Heh.

The Weekly Austin - 10.28.09

2009-10-28T08:39:00.000-04:00

I Walk The Line - 10.21.09

Austin's striking out on his own more and more these days. He still circles back for a squeeze and a kiss every once and a while, but for the most part, he flies solo. It's a good thing, really; he's becoming a little more independent, a little more self-sufficient. I can see how it could make you sad, the fact that your baby needs you less and less as time goes by. But I'm not sad. I love watching this transformation from little helpless bug to little grown person. It happens so fast, faster than I ever imagined it would.

Pugtastic Tuesday - HALLOWEEN EDITION!

2009-10-27T10:35:00.003-04:00

Generally, I'm not a fan of putting clothes on animals. Dogs are not people, they're not children, no matter how much you love and care for them. I make an exception for Halloween, mostly because the pugs just look too funny with costumes on.

When we had just Pugly, I didn't bother. But after Alabama joined our gang, I knew I had to do something with the two of them. On their first Halloween together, back in 2006, I dressed them up as Team Deviled Eggs (a chicken and the devil):

Doesn't Pugly look THRILLED? He later tried to attack the giant inflatable pumpkin seen behind them in this shot.

In 2007, we went with an insect theme, Beetle and the Bee:

This time Alabama looks mad; Pugly enjoyed his bee costume and the attention he got while wearing it at our Halloween party.

I'm really getting a kick out of these pictures today, mostly because I know our days of doggie costumes are done. 2008 was Austin's first Halloween, so he got all the attention. And this year, with Pugly still not at 100%, it seems a little mean to force him into a costume. I may throw something together at the last minute, just for a picture or two, but I don't think it'll be anything elaborate.

Anyhoo, the pugs have asked me to tell all of you HAPPY PUG-O-WEEN, and they're accepting candy donations if you have any to spare.

This IS Being Productive

2009-10-22T19:16:00.007-04:00

Can't think of anything to do before 9 o'clock on a Thursday night? Why not surprise your hubs or housemate or whomever in the kitchen while they're making dinner? But, just as you're trying to be all paparazzi-ninja, realize there's no memory card in your camera. Then, for real fun, almost burn yourself while trying to take pictures. Hilarity will ensue, I assure you.

Once you finally manage to get a memory card in your camera, you too can capture AMAZING paparazzi-ninja quality images, such as these:

FLIED LICE! WHITE LICE!

Stop Making That Face. STOP! STOP! I'M GOING TO PEE!

Kissy Kissy (or, I MARRIED THE TICK! See the spoon?)

What? What do YOU do until your favorite show comes on?

The Weekly Austin - 10.21.09

2009-10-21T08:24:00.001-04:00

More! 10.18.09

Since he was a baby, we've tried teaching Austin a few signs to help him communicate. The only two he's really picked up are "ALL DONE" and "MORE." I'd hoped that signing would help him express things to me before he could say the words for what he needed, but so far...not so much. He also doesn't really talk yet. I'm told it's nothing to worry about; lots of kids don't talk until they're two or even three years old. He interacts with everyone really well, he can identify all sorts of things from pictures, and he definitely gets his point across when he wants something (or when he's happy -- "SCREEEEEECH!"). His ears are fine, he's not autistic; so why do I worry? I don't know. I guess it's just my job as a mom.

The Charles

2009-10-20T13:21:00.004-04:00

The Charles in His Natural Habitat

I'm having one of those days where I feel very appreciative of my husband. So, in lieu of Pugtastic Tuesday, I'm having a Hooray for Hubby day.

For two days in a row, he's taken care of Austin's bedtime and morning routines, just so I can go to bed early and get up early to run and go to work. And he rotated the laundry for me. And cleaned up the kitchen. When I came home from work this morning, I hardly had anything to do. It was an extra-nice surprise.

Sometimes it's easy to fall into the pattern of thinking only about his faults (few though they are) or the times when we don't always get along so well. I have to remind myself to focus on the good stuff, because there's so much of it. Like this:

The picture itself isn't much. But the fact that he still has it on his computer nearly six years after snapping it with a cell phone? Awesome.

My Triumphant Return to Teh Intarwebs

2009-10-19T13:26:00.003-04:00

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...

EASY MAC.

I made Easy Mac as part of the kid's dinner the other night (yes, I feed my child uber-processed, microwavable crap from time to time -- so sue me!), and as happens every time I make it, I ended up staring at the bowl when it came out of the microwave. I love, and I do mean LOVE, how the noodles manage to stand themselves up on end. The picture above shows a pretty good arrangement, but I've had bowls in the past where all but one or two macaroni (macarono? I mean, if macaronI is plural...just sayin'.) are vertical.

I'm sure there's an explanation for it, probably something to do with the fiber in the pasta, steam, etc. But quite frankly, my dear fellow noodle-phile, I don't give a damn. It's a small, small thing that makes me smile. AND SO I SHARE IT WITH YOU, INTARWEBS!

Note: If you're looking for The Weekly Austin, it's been moved to Wednesday.

Hiatus

2009-10-13T16:31:00.002-04:00

It occurred to me last night that I'd completely flaked and forgotten to post on either one of my blogs yesterday. I'm not sure if my priorities have shifted a bit, or if I just don't have anything to write about at the moment. Either way, I'm going to take a brief hiatus from actively posting on either blog (here or Foodie vs. Fattie). This'll give me time to deal with some changes around the house, including my return to work and a lot of computery switcheroo-ness (Hubs got a new laptop and thus we're reorganizing everything).

See you next Monday!

Monkey Business

2009-10-07T12:11:00.005-04:00

My friend Melissa and her husband joined us for Taco Night last night. They brought their adorable bebe, and I can't even put into words how much fun it was to watch him play with Austin. They're about six months apart in age, but Little T is way ahead of where Austin was (in terms of physical development) at that age. He can also say "Uh oh," which, O MY GOD THE CUTENESS!

Austin had a little trouble being gentle with T, but that's age-appropriate I guess. Plus, well, Austin plows into everything and anything that moves. T took it very well; he's a tough guy, just like his daddy (his mommy's pretty damn tough, too!).

I picked both the boys up at the same time, holding one on each hip. It felt really, really good. I've had doubts about having more children, but last night sealed the deal. I want more. I know I have to wait, both because of my surgery and because I need to lose a significant amount of weight, but I am so ready to do this all over again.

Me & My Little Man - 5.17.2008

Pugtastic Tuesday - 10.6.09

2009-10-06T10:32:00.002-04:00

Relaxin' in my Basket

Alabama has always enjoyed sleeping in her toy basket. Nowadays, she hides in it when she wants Austin to leave her alone.

The Weekly Austin - 10.5.09

2009-10-05T09:10:00.002-04:00

Slide - 9.14.09

Mystery Bulge Update

2009-09-30T19:46:00.002-04:00

I finally met with my surgeon today. After waiting in his office for an hour (that's right, and hour -- he was running late at the hospital next door), I found out that he doesn't think I have another hernia.

Wait, what?

That's right. It's NOT another hernia. Based on the results of my CT, he thinks it's just a fluid-filled sac where my last hernia was. Nothing to worry about, no need for more surgery. This is great news, except...why have I been in pain for the last three weeks?

He doesn't have an answer for that question. It could be any number of things -- scar tissue, muscles stretching, tacks (sutures) that attach the mesh to my inner bits dissolving at last. I'm not happy about this part of it. I need to know WHY. So, I'm going to work on a few things on my own and see what I can figure out.

In the meantime, I have two choices: I can just move on from here, go back to work, start working out again. Or, the Doc can stick a laparoscope in my gut and "look around" to see if anything not-so-good is going on. I'm going with option A. I don't want to miss any more work, I have to get back to my running, and well, quite frankly, I am so sick and tired of this crap that I just want to put it all behind me.

So that's the haps, kids. I wasted three weeks to end up right back where I started. Oh well.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 9.29.09

2009-09-29T08:24:00.000-04:00

Faithful Companion - 9.20.09

The Weekly Austin - 9.28.09

2009-09-28T08:07:00.000-04:00

We Appreciate Your Interest. Thank You for Taking the Time to Write - 9.24.09

Ever wondered who really writes this blog?

Things They Don't Tell You About Husbands

2009-09-25T08:17:00.001-04:00

You'd think that since Charlie and I lived together before we got married, there wouldn't be a whole lot of surprises. I have news for you, kids. It's just like a box of Cracker Jack; there's ALWAYS a surprise, and most of the time it sucks. Here's a few of my favorites:

1. When you really need to pee, he will camp out in the bathroom and take a paint-melting, bowl-shaking, stinkier than a bullfrog's armpit, giant explosive CRAP. And fail to use either the exhaust fan OR the air freshener. Ideally, this will occur in the downstairs bathroom, about three seconds before dinner guests arrive.

2. It will seem at times that the longer you are married, the dumber (or deafer) he gets. The truth is, he's acting dumb on purpose so that you will stop asking him to do things.

3. He will go get you Krispy Kremes at ten o'clock at night. (Or refuse to get them for you, depending on your current diet status.) He'll also eat them in bed with you while watching old movies.

4. Occasional gifts will become less romantic and more practical. Perfect example: Last night, I was given a pooper scooper. Because, you know, nothing says "I love you" like a set of tongs used to scrape dog dookie off the grass.

5. Not much has changed since he was ten. He still likes cereal, Transformers, and fart jokes. Now he just knows about BJs.

6. You will love him more and more every day, even when he tells you his favorite show of all time is "Saved By The Bell."

This one's for you, Hubs. I love you!

You Drive Me Crazy in the Best of All Possible Ways

1999

2009-09-24T08:14:00.002-04:00

I was taking photography classes at a local community college. Photo was my favorite class -- black and white photography with an honest-to-goodness darkroom. (Remember those? It's before we all got those newfangled cameras with chips and LCD screens.) I was living at home with my dad, but spent most of my time in Norfolk at my then-boyfriend's house with my best girlfriend. We partied a lot, mostly at a bar right down the street from Boyfriend's apartment. Boyfriend had a cool roommate, a musician, who let me take nekkid pictures of him and also spent a lot of time staying up late and talking about life while we listened to Steely Dan.

As often happens, Boyfriend and I broke up. Shortly afterwards, Roommate introduced me to a guy friend of his, who in turn invited me to a party at his house. I went alone (stupid). When I walked in, it didn't seem like much of a party. Just Guy and his housemates, two big military types. I felt very awkward, and something didn't seem quite right. But I stayed (stupid, again).

I sat down on the couch and one of the guys left the room; he came back with a drink and handed it to me. "What's this?" I asked.

"Just drink it, you'll like it!" (Stupid, stupid, stupid.)

By the time I finished the drink, I was drunk. Now, I was by no means a pro boozer at that time, but it usually took more than a single cocktail to get me buzzed. But I figured they'd just fixed me something extra strong (say it with me...stupid).

I don't remember a whole lot after that. I remember getting pushed up a flight of stairs, and then my clothes were gone, and then a lot of really bad stuff happened very fast. Three guys in the house, and one of me. They took turns. And there was a video camera in the room.

Afterwards, they put me into the bathtub and turned the shower on. I'm pretty sure I passed out at that point. When I came to, I was curled up on the bathroom floor. I'd managed to find a blanket and covered myself up with it. It was barely dawn. Everyone in the house was asleep. I stumbled around and found my clothes and my keys, and I got in my car and left.

When I got home, my dad was furious. I'd been out all night without calling -- a big no-no. I didn't tell him what happened; I just said I'd fallen asleep at a friend's house and forgotten to call. He told me to never let it happen again.

I went to school that day feeling very hollow and confused. Did I really do that? Did I just have sex with three guys at once? What the hell? So I called Guy's house, thinking it might have been a bad dream. One of the housemates answered. When I asked what'd happened, he laughed and said, "We drugged you. What'd you think happened?"

I remember laughing. He has to be joking, right? He hung up. After that, I wasn't so sure.

I told my therapist that I had "hooked up" with three guys, and when she got the story out of me, she told me that it didn't sound like a hookup to her. She didn't pressure me to do anything about it, and it just sort of fell out of our conversation after that.

I never heard from or saw them again. I never told my friends that it had been against my will. I never called the police, never told my parents. I buried it, and it's lurked there for ten years.

I don't want this rotting inside me anymore. So, there it is, the first and last time I'm telling the story. It's done.

Silent All These Years

2009-09-23T08:04:00.004-04:00

It's been a long time since I listened to Tori Amos. In high school, it was a daily thing. It fit perfectly with my emo/goth/friend o' the lesbians thing. I even got to see her perform at the Harrison Opera House - it was one of the first concerts I ever saw.

I remember singing these songs at the top of my lungs, shut up in my room with giant Koss headphones hooked up to my enormous (yet very cool at the time) bookshelf stereo system. Listening to them now is a bit different. My son sleeps upstairs and has no idea that Mommy is riding a piano down Amnesia Lane.

They're still amazing and intense, full of sadness and angst and quirkiness and sometimes rage. I still have the urge to sing at the top of my lungs, rocking back and forth, hammering my fingers on my desk like a piano keyboard. But that heart-wrenching teenage passion I felt is faded; it's given way to a sort of scarred sadness that hides underneath my daily self. The music's a stinging salve; memories burn, the scars pull taut, and sometimes I think what's hidden underneath will spill out and stain all the beauty that's in my life now.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 9.22.09

2009-09-22T09:09:00.002-04:00

Pugslide - 5.21.2007

Pugly's having some health issues lately. We noticed him limping about a week ago, and the vet says it may be a neurological problem (as opposed to a muscular or skeletal problem). We have to keep him confined to his crate for two weeks. If there's no improvement, then we'll have to have some tests done. It's a sad affair, really, especially when I watch little clips like this one that show him in his prime.

The Weekly Austin - 9.21.09

2009-09-21T08:27:00.002-04:00

Playing Before Dinner - 9.13.09

Pugtastic Tuesday - 9.15.09

2009-09-15T16:33:00.003-04:00

The Long Ride Home - 5.27.06

Someone asked me recently what Alabama looked like as a puppy. This is her at about eight weeks old, sitting in my lap on the ride home from the breeder's place in Galax, Virginia.

The Weekly Austin - 9.14.09

2009-09-14T08:34:00.003-04:00

BOO! 5.16.08

Another "oldie but goodie." Where'd all that face chub go?

Here We Go Again

2009-09-09T08:58:00.003-04:00

I was drying myself off after a shower the other night, and felt a familiar bulge in my stomach. I pulled up what I lovingly refer to as "The Flap" (my huge post-baby gut thing) and saw a lump sticking out about the size of a large egg.

MotherFUCK. I know exactly what this is. Another goddamn hernia.

If you've been reading this here blog for a while, you may recall that back in February of this year, I discovered a similar lump in my belly that turned out to be an incisional hernia. I had surgery to repair it in March, and everything's been fine since then. At that time, my biggest concern was that I wouldn't be able to have more children after the surgery. My surgeon told me it would not be an issue, as long as I waited a year before getting pregnant. Cool, right? I could deal with that.

And now here we are six months later, and I have another hernia. It's not in the exact same place, but it's close. I have a sneaking suspicion that some of my guts are creeping out from the edge of the mesh that was installed (installed? like a dishwasher?) last time. I have to go back to my doctor and get another CT scan to be sure. At any rate, it means another surgery, another month off of work (and working out). And this time I'm not sure what the outlook will be on future babies.

I'm trying really hard not to be upset about this. Last time, I got very, very depressed -- the surgery derailed my fitness plans, and taking a month off of work was a big kick in our financial balls. This time, I'm angry. I want to know why this is happening. My first instinct is to blame my body ("Well, if you didn't have so much FAT pulling on your abs, this wouldn't happen!"), but I'm trying to let that go. I may have to just file the whole thing under "Shit Happens" and move on.

My mom, Charlie, and my personal trainer (you can read about him over at my other blog) have all been really supportive. Charlie gives me comfort, and Mom and Smith are keeping me from giving up on my fitness goals. I have awesome friends to hold me up, too. Overall, I'm a lucky gal. I'm trying to focus on that instead of the negatives.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 9.8.09

2009-09-08T16:17:00.003-04:00

Look At Zees Face! How Can Yoo Rezeest?

The Weekly Austin - 9.7.09

2009-09-07T17:40:00.002-04:00

Jeffrey? Is That You? 9.6.09

Charlie took Austin to the zoo while I was at work yesterday. Apparently, little man is very into giraffes right now.

He Saves My Life

2009-09-04T17:55:00.003-04:00

Having worked with kids in the past, and babysat for what seemed like a million years, I know that one of the best parts of working with little kids is their hugs. They're sometimes sticky (or stinky, even), but so worth it. What I didn't know was how hugs and kisses from my OWN kid could save me from the worst days, the sad-sack days, the days when everything goes wrong. Or how your child can tell when something's bothering you, and gives you exactly what you need.

I've had kind of a crappy day. A lot of little things have gone wrong, nothing life-altering, but a little stressful just the same. When I went upstairs to get Austin from his afternoon nap, he looked up at me from his little blanket-nest in the crib and gave me a huge smile. "DA!" he said, and jumped to his feet. His little hands clutched the rail, and he flung his head into my chest -- his loving head-butt.

I carried him down the stairs. We reached the bottom, and instead of wiggling out of my arms, he shrieked when I tried to set him down and nuzzled his head into my neck. We walked around a little bit, me and my Bug, looking out the windows, talking to the dogs. I asked if he wanted to watch a show, and he nodded his head yes. Normally, he'll watch about five minutes of an episode of say, "Bob the Builder," and then ignore the TV and play. Today, when I sat down on the floor, he crawled into my lap and leaned back against me. I wrapped my arms around his waist and kissed the top of his head, and he let out a big sigh. "Yeah, Buddy...tough day, huh?"

He nodded, "Da," and stroked my jeans. Tears welled up in my eyes. Not tears of sadness, but of gratitude. Oh, why did no one ever tell me it could be like this?

Thank you, thank you, thank you, God or whoever, for this tiny person who heals my heart.

Dairy Love

2009-09-03T05:43:00.001-04:00

Dear Greek Yogurt,

I love you. Please, don't ever leave me.

-Me

Don't Wanna

2009-09-02T09:29:00.000-04:00

I'm having one of those days where I want to hide under the covers. I know I'll feel better after I get a shower and a second cup of coffee. But right now? It is teh suck.

The weather is beautiful, Kid is behaving (sort of), Hubs got out the door with breakfast in his stomach and lunch in his bag. But something's bugging me, and I can't put my finger on it. I'm a little tired...a little frustrated about work...a little annoyed that the kitchen sink was full of dishes when I got up this morning. Hopefully I can shake it all off before I head to work in a bit. If not, it'll be Surly Day at Starbucks.

Pugtastic Tuesday - 9.1.09

2009-09-01T11:27:00.003-04:00

Partners in Crime - 8.30.2009

Austin and Alabama seem to be inseparable lately. She's always been more interested in him than Pugly was, but now the two of them seem to be best buddies. Maybe she thinks of him as her pup?

(Or maybe he just feeds her cherry tomatoes from the garden all day.)

The Weekly Austin - 8.31.09

2009-08-31T14:15:00.001-04:00

Best Friends - 9.30.2008

Poolside

2009-08-27T10:50:00.005-04:00

I recently received three big envelopes in the mail. Each was stuffed with old family photos. Apparently, my sisters have been emptying out my dad's house and distributing the millions of pictures he accumulated over the years.

As soon as I saw these two, I laughed. I have no idea where they were taken. I'd guess it's about 1981 or so, but the location escapes me.

Who the heck drinks champagne from a paper cup, at the Ramada? Oh yeah, my dad.

I remember spending a lot of time in the water as a kid, both at the beach and at the pool. By the time I was four, I knew how to ask if the hotel had a pool, and figured out in about five minutes how to get there. I always had tan lines, always had tons of bathing suits, and back then, I didn't care what I looked like in them. "She swims like a fish!" my dad would say.

My Aunt Irene taught me to hold my breath and swim underwater, and how to body-surf. Mom taught me about riptides and currents, and Dad? Well, Dad mostly showed me how to look really goddamn cool.